De cand ma stiu a fost locul in care ma simt in siguranta...Inconjurata de natura si rasfat, ma delectez cu peisaje impresionante si momente de ras tacut,"acel ras care te trimite la pamant cu lacrimi". Privesc luna noua ce s-a cocotat pe cerul albastrui si ma intreb...nu fara farmec si uimire...:"Unde te duci asa grabit?"...M-as pierde in valul dulceag al amintirilor,insa sunetul zglobiu al vocii lui Darius ma trezeste la realitate..A trecut de mult perioada in care imi doaream sa il aud spunandu-mi numele, fiind nevoita sa ma multumesc doar cu ganguritul firav scos atunci cand se aciua in bratele mele. Acum vorbeste mult, pune intrebari multe, scoate "perle" multe...Le strang pe toate in inima, in cufarul meu micut, ingramadind unele peste altele poze, peisaje, figuri, sfaturi...Zambetul lui inramat de cei mai frumosi ochi negri, sunt de ajuns sa ma faca sa spun "pa"(chiar daca e doar pentru cateva ore) viselor mele si sa revin cu picioarele pe planeta celor cuvantatori. Are nevoie de mine. Poate doar pentru a-i arata cum se face un nod, sau pentru nu stiu ce bubita ce mi-o arata incruntat pe manuta dolofana. "E grav?"...Ma priveste cu ochii sclipind asteptand sa ii spun sa aduca spirtul din dulap. Topaie voios, ca dupa cateva momente sa tremure din tot trupsorul de efectul acid avut de spirt asupra "ranii"..Dar zambeste. Ma vrea tot timpul langa el, si nu il inteleg cum de ma poate iubi chiar si dupa ce imi pierd uneori rabdarea cu el. "Nu-i nimic, bibi"...Se intristeaza cand aude ca trebuie sa plec si trebuie sa ii promit la nesfarsit ca o sa ma intorc si o sa stau cu el "mult, mult, mult"...In seara asta canta incetisor, cu telefonul mamei la ureche:" Intoarce-te din drumul tau/Intoarce-te la Dumnezeu", iar glasul lui micut ma inmoaie pana la lacrimi...Il pup repede de noapte buna si ma refugiez in camera cu amintiri, cu bobite sclipind la coltul ochilor...nu il merit.
Wednesday, December 28, 2011
Dulceag...
De cand ma stiu a fost locul in care ma simt in siguranta...Inconjurata de natura si rasfat, ma delectez cu peisaje impresionante si momente de ras tacut,"acel ras care te trimite la pamant cu lacrimi". Privesc luna noua ce s-a cocotat pe cerul albastrui si ma intreb...nu fara farmec si uimire...:"Unde te duci asa grabit?"...M-as pierde in valul dulceag al amintirilor,insa sunetul zglobiu al vocii lui Darius ma trezeste la realitate..A trecut de mult perioada in care imi doaream sa il aud spunandu-mi numele, fiind nevoita sa ma multumesc doar cu ganguritul firav scos atunci cand se aciua in bratele mele. Acum vorbeste mult, pune intrebari multe, scoate "perle" multe...Le strang pe toate in inima, in cufarul meu micut, ingramadind unele peste altele poze, peisaje, figuri, sfaturi...Zambetul lui inramat de cei mai frumosi ochi negri, sunt de ajuns sa ma faca sa spun "pa"(chiar daca e doar pentru cateva ore) viselor mele si sa revin cu picioarele pe planeta celor cuvantatori. Are nevoie de mine. Poate doar pentru a-i arata cum se face un nod, sau pentru nu stiu ce bubita ce mi-o arata incruntat pe manuta dolofana. "E grav?"...Ma priveste cu ochii sclipind asteptand sa ii spun sa aduca spirtul din dulap. Topaie voios, ca dupa cateva momente sa tremure din tot trupsorul de efectul acid avut de spirt asupra "ranii"..Dar zambeste. Ma vrea tot timpul langa el, si nu il inteleg cum de ma poate iubi chiar si dupa ce imi pierd uneori rabdarea cu el. "Nu-i nimic, bibi"...Se intristeaza cand aude ca trebuie sa plec si trebuie sa ii promit la nesfarsit ca o sa ma intorc si o sa stau cu el "mult, mult, mult"...In seara asta canta incetisor, cu telefonul mamei la ureche:" Intoarce-te din drumul tau/Intoarce-te la Dumnezeu", iar glasul lui micut ma inmoaie pana la lacrimi...Il pup repede de noapte buna si ma refugiez in camera cu amintiri, cu bobite sclipind la coltul ochilor...nu il merit.
Tuesday, December 27, 2011
Wednesday, December 14, 2011
Monday, December 12, 2011
remembering...

My childhood is not dotted with endless trips to Disneyland. I got my first Barbie doll at the age of 13 not 3 and my first cell phone at 17. It was a Sony Ericsson. Made me go crazy sometimes. I discovered the Internet when I was not old enough to explore it, but I did. My first ID was: me_sweety...I didn't even know how to spell it. I've never had a pet. Not even a family car of our own. No, my childhood is not like the one in our days.
But what I had, nobody can take from me. The memories of the way to church in that little car with the steering wheel on the right, are unforgettable. I remember the days my mom was gathering us in on the sofa and read to us from the Bible. I was not raised with a Christmas tree, nor with the fairy tales about Santa. But I was raised with a story about Baby Jesus being born in a poor manger having no food and no heat, just the breath of the animals inside it. I was taught many poems and verses and christian songs. I didn't play FarmVille, but I had my own little farm. Even if that was composed from my dear old Molda and a few callow hens.I remember the hot sunny days of summer when we were having water-fights and those long family barbeques which we had until the sun was going down. We were wondering at the stars, trying to write names with them.I remember all the happy moments with my family, like it was yesterday. I lived dreaming about a country house, near city, which today I have. It doesn't have that big old fireplace, nor the big wooden stairs. But the worm smile of my mom and a proper hug from my dad, makes me feel like I'm where I'm supposed to be. Home...
Thursday, December 08, 2011
nEEds

Woke up at 6 a.m. Didn't want to go to work. Pulled myself out of my dream and through the streets and arrived at work, just in time. Talked. Laughed. Had a headache. All three at the same time. Awful. Listened to Matthew West all the way home. "One last Christmas" made my cry.
Made a "need" list. Too long. No money. No will to go shopping. Worried about what I have, what I need, and even what I don't need. Asked myself how many pairs of gloves should I buy.Thought about my trip. All this on my way home. Met a complete stranger at the corner of the street. Looked at him. Saw his clothes, his wind- cracked hands, his needs. Analyzed him. Looked at my "need" list. Broke it into pieces...
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Wednesday, December 28, 2011
Dulceag...
De cand ma stiu a fost locul in care ma simt in siguranta...Inconjurata de natura si rasfat, ma delectez cu peisaje impresionante si momente de ras tacut,"acel ras care te trimite la pamant cu lacrimi". Privesc luna noua ce s-a cocotat pe cerul albastrui si ma intreb...nu fara farmec si uimire...:"Unde te duci asa grabit?"...M-as pierde in valul dulceag al amintirilor,insa sunetul zglobiu al vocii lui Darius ma trezeste la realitate..A trecut de mult perioada in care imi doaream sa il aud spunandu-mi numele, fiind nevoita sa ma multumesc doar cu ganguritul firav scos atunci cand se aciua in bratele mele. Acum vorbeste mult, pune intrebari multe, scoate "perle" multe...Le strang pe toate in inima, in cufarul meu micut, ingramadind unele peste altele poze, peisaje, figuri, sfaturi...Zambetul lui inramat de cei mai frumosi ochi negri, sunt de ajuns sa ma faca sa spun "pa"(chiar daca e doar pentru cateva ore) viselor mele si sa revin cu picioarele pe planeta celor cuvantatori. Are nevoie de mine. Poate doar pentru a-i arata cum se face un nod, sau pentru nu stiu ce bubita ce mi-o arata incruntat pe manuta dolofana. "E grav?"...Ma priveste cu ochii sclipind asteptand sa ii spun sa aduca spirtul din dulap. Topaie voios, ca dupa cateva momente sa tremure din tot trupsorul de efectul acid avut de spirt asupra "ranii"..Dar zambeste. Ma vrea tot timpul langa el, si nu il inteleg cum de ma poate iubi chiar si dupa ce imi pierd uneori rabdarea cu el. "Nu-i nimic, bibi"...Se intristeaza cand aude ca trebuie sa plec si trebuie sa ii promit la nesfarsit ca o sa ma intorc si o sa stau cu el "mult, mult, mult"...In seara asta canta incetisor, cu telefonul mamei la ureche:" Intoarce-te din drumul tau/Intoarce-te la Dumnezeu", iar glasul lui micut ma inmoaie pana la lacrimi...Il pup repede de noapte buna si ma refugiez in camera cu amintiri, cu bobite sclipind la coltul ochilor...nu il merit.
Tuesday, December 27, 2011
Wednesday, December 14, 2011
Monday, December 12, 2011
remembering...

My childhood is not dotted with endless trips to Disneyland. I got my first Barbie doll at the age of 13 not 3 and my first cell phone at 17. It was a Sony Ericsson. Made me go crazy sometimes. I discovered the Internet when I was not old enough to explore it, but I did. My first ID was: me_sweety...I didn't even know how to spell it. I've never had a pet. Not even a family car of our own. No, my childhood is not like the one in our days.
But what I had, nobody can take from me. The memories of the way to church in that little car with the steering wheel on the right, are unforgettable. I remember the days my mom was gathering us in on the sofa and read to us from the Bible. I was not raised with a Christmas tree, nor with the fairy tales about Santa. But I was raised with a story about Baby Jesus being born in a poor manger having no food and no heat, just the breath of the animals inside it. I was taught many poems and verses and christian songs. I didn't play FarmVille, but I had my own little farm. Even if that was composed from my dear old Molda and a few callow hens.I remember the hot sunny days of summer when we were having water-fights and those long family barbeques which we had until the sun was going down. We were wondering at the stars, trying to write names with them.I remember all the happy moments with my family, like it was yesterday. I lived dreaming about a country house, near city, which today I have. It doesn't have that big old fireplace, nor the big wooden stairs. But the worm smile of my mom and a proper hug from my dad, makes me feel like I'm where I'm supposed to be. Home...
Thursday, December 08, 2011
nEEds

Woke up at 6 a.m. Didn't want to go to work. Pulled myself out of my dream and through the streets and arrived at work, just in time. Talked. Laughed. Had a headache. All three at the same time. Awful. Listened to Matthew West all the way home. "One last Christmas" made my cry.
Made a "need" list. Too long. No money. No will to go shopping. Worried about what I have, what I need, and even what I don't need. Asked myself how many pairs of gloves should I buy.Thought about my trip. All this on my way home. Met a complete stranger at the corner of the street. Looked at him. Saw his clothes, his wind- cracked hands, his needs. Analyzed him. Looked at my "need" list. Broke it into pieces...
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